This is a very good question. There are many ways to forgive others, but the REASON to forgive is only one. When someone does something wrong, bad to you then you react. Sometimes the reaction is visible, external, like someone punches you and you punch them back. But other times reaction may not be external, physical. Wrong/Bad doings by anyone can hurt you in many ways. Physically, Financially or Emotionally. Hurt or wound may or may not be physical or financial, but it is definitely emotional in you, and that’s the reason you are asking this question. So you are carrying an emotional wound in you and you want to heal it, let it go.
Forgiving may seem like something being done to another person, other than you yourself, but it is a “Reflection” of the emotional wound/scar in you. So the ONLY reason to forgive someone is because you want to “heal yourself”. Forgiving is not an act of pride or charity or greatness. You are not forgiving someone to help them. You are forgiving to help yourself. You have a sore wound in you, and it’s not letting you breathe and live and you want to heal it. Now how important it is for you, to heal yourself? Did you reach a point where it is an absolute necessity? If yes, then just visualize the person who had hurt you, in your mind and say this to yourself “I forgive you for everything that you have done to me, you were only human”. Keep repeating it every day for few weeks to let it sink in your heart. Slowly the healing inside you will take place, and you will be free of your emotional wound. Here, mind it, you are not only accepting that the other person is human to make mistakes, you are accepting your own human-ness too. Humans do get hurt and humans do forgive others. Every time you forgive someone, your ego breaks. Why? Because you connect the act of forgiving to "someone" else. Once you understand that you are not forgiving for the benefit or sake of that other person, instead you are forgiving for yourself, to heal your own wound, your mind/ego won’t do much drama. Now, another point to understand here is, that every situation in our life is teaching us a lesson. It could be the lesson of Self-Love, Self-Worth. How does one learn the lesson of Self-Love, Self-Worth? By healing their emotional wounds and in order heal them, you have to forgive others.
~ Adiguru
Forgiving may seem like something being done to another person, other than you yourself, but it is a “Reflection” of the emotional wound/scar in you. So the ONLY reason to forgive someone is because you want to “heal yourself”. Forgiving is not an act of pride or charity or greatness. You are not forgiving someone to help them. You are forgiving to help yourself. You have a sore wound in you, and it’s not letting you breathe and live and you want to heal it. Now how important it is for you, to heal yourself? Did you reach a point where it is an absolute necessity? If yes, then just visualize the person who had hurt you, in your mind and say this to yourself “I forgive you for everything that you have done to me, you were only human”. Keep repeating it every day for few weeks to let it sink in your heart. Slowly the healing inside you will take place, and you will be free of your emotional wound. Here, mind it, you are not only accepting that the other person is human to make mistakes, you are accepting your own human-ness too. Humans do get hurt and humans do forgive others. Every time you forgive someone, your ego breaks. Why? Because you connect the act of forgiving to "someone" else. Once you understand that you are not forgiving for the benefit or sake of that other person, instead you are forgiving for yourself, to heal your own wound, your mind/ego won’t do much drama. Now, another point to understand here is, that every situation in our life is teaching us a lesson. It could be the lesson of Self-Love, Self-Worth. How does one learn the lesson of Self-Love, Self-Worth? By healing their emotional wounds and in order heal them, you have to forgive others.
~ Adiguru
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