The first thing that you need to understand is that you are divided into two major parts. 30% is your Mind, your logical, rational part in you, not your brain, but your Mental Body (Manas). And 70% of you is Heart, not the physical heart, but your Emotional Body (Chitta). Neither "Heart" is always right in you, nor your "Mind" is always right. If the mind is right that doesn't mean the heart is wrong, and if the heart is right that doesn't mean your mind is wrong. Hence so much confusion. Hence so much mess, disturbance within you. As neither heart (Chitta) is pure, integrated nor your mind (Manas) is pure and integrated. The heart has some incomplete emotional issues (Chitta-Vrittis) hidden deep in many layers and Mind has many desires unfulfilled decisions that went wrong many times and you got beaten up by people around you and most importantly whether you had an emotional accident or a mental accident, you ended up beating yourself. So neither your mind is in good condition, nor your heart.
Instead of being just logical and rational, the mind has become "fear" driven. And instead of being pure courageous hearty being, your Heart has turned into a "Tantrum throwing child". Now the fight is always "on" within you. Your mind comes up with some logical-rational decision or desire but that Tantrum throwing child (your heart) is not interested in it and will go on denying it and making you feel sad, depressed, unhappy. When that Tantrum throwing child wants something, immediately your mind comes up with all sorts of logical-rational justifications as to why you can't have it, why you shouldn't have it and what are the repercussions? But regardless of all logic and rationale, that tantrum child goes on crying. Can you give a logical explanation to a crying child? No! You cannot. So then how to stop this war within? Whom to listen, to that tantrum child or to your mind?
Well, the question that you should be asking is not "whom" should I listen? Because right now both are "corrupted" in you, "damaged" in you. Your mind is driven by fears because you failed many times in life. And your heart, your emotions have suffered deeply in the past too and harbouring many "wounds within" but still goes on asking for same damn things again and again only to get denied, so it has turned into a Tantrum Child. Or you might have locked that tantrum child behind seven walls and must have thrown the keys into the ocean, so you do not hear the hue and cry.
So both are "incapable" of giving directions and leading you anywhere in life. Both are in bad condition. Then what should be done?
~ COMPLETION ~
Yes, one word "Completion" is what you need to do.
You need to "Heal" the mind by getting rid of all the Fears. Fears are " distorted imaginations" of mind which happens to you because you do not know how this Cosmos and the Life in it functions. Learn, educate yourself, enrich yourself. Change your understanding, the perception that you have about your "failures". Know that failures taught you a "lesson" not "fear". Sit down, write on paper what all failures you had and the fear connected to each one of them. Do some analysis, think through for few days, weeks and then write down the "lesson" that each failure has taught you. Replace those "fears" with "lessons". That way your Mind will be healed and will not be driven by useless fears. That way you will go into "Completion" with your incomplete mental patterns/thought patterns. You will go to completion with those failed experiences. And this completion is what most people fail to do whenever they experience any failures in life, and later on, they become just fear driven.
Remember, Completion Heals.
Now, look at your feelings, your emotions and how many times you got wounded. Write down all those things, love, person, presence, money, stuff that your heart wanted but your Mind/Logic denied. You were in love with someone, but mind said no no you can't be with them because of so and so reasons. You wanted that costly watch or latest mobile phone and mind said no not now. You wanted that house, but mind said no way. You wanted to stay longer in the arms of your beloved but mind said, OK, get up now, this and that is pending so better get going. You wanted to be with your child, but mind said no it's enough. After so many years of denial now it feels as if you never got what you wanted. You never did what you wanted. You never could live life as you wanted to. There is serious, deep sadness within you. There is bitterness, unhappiness in you. Why did this happen?
Now, you need to understand some metaphysics here. Your desires comes from your emotional states which is the Upper Surface of your Emotional Body and your Beliefs are "deep" embedded patterns in your Emotional Body, which now have becomes permanent in you because of life-long social conditioning.
All the desires that you come up with go through outright denial by your "own mind" because of your "BELIEFS". Yes, you wanted to love that person and be with them. But you have a belief within you saying "you are not worthy of love", "you are not good enough", "you will NEVER get him/her", "you are a loser" or that "it's not right for you". You were taught by the society what is right and what is wrong for you. Yes, you wanted to have six-pack body but you have a belief that "oh no, I can never become like that, my body is not like that, I will always be fat". Yes, you wanted to study this or that, but because everyone said "oh it's not your cup of tea, or it too complex for you, or it doesn't pay well. You created a belief in you that "no it's not for you. You want to be rich, but deep within you, you believe in having less, having enough to meet ends, you justify having less, you are against abundance, you believe in scarcity. You believe this Universe doesn't have enough for everyone to become Rich, in other words, you believe in Poverty.
You need to understand that "you will manifest what you believe". That's the TRUTH. You will never find love, and even if you find you will lose it because you believe "you do not deserve it, you are not worthy of it or else you might have got it from the one whom you loved before". You will never become Rich, even if you win a lottery after few years you will be back to where you started because you believe in scarcity in one way or the other. You will never achieve perfect health, because your belief system says "after 40 everyone gets a couple of health problems, it's OK, it' OK, in other words, you are in surrender to disease, not Health. So you manifest diseases and not health.
Now, sit down, write on paper, the major problems that you have in life. See what is the deeply connected belief you have related to that. Once you know your wrong/opposite belief, CHANGE it. Stop believing in it.
You "mistakenly," think something in life needs to happen in order to change that belief. Because you got that belief in the first place because something happened. You think your belief of not being worthy of love is because many people rejected you, walked-out of your life. NO, NO, NO. That's not true. Before even anyone loved you, you had the belief that "you were not good enough". 99% of your beliefs are formed during childhood and teenage. That's it. So list all such beliefs you have about yourself and change them.
Practice opposite of them. Not for a day or two, but for at least that many months, however many years you have practised the Wrong Belief. Life will change. You will go into "Completion" with your "Heart", with your "Emotional Body". You will Heal your Emotional Body and no more wounds will be left within.
Once your Mental and Emotional body is healed, are in Completion, they are READY to Lead your Life. Now you can listen to your Mind or Heart. Because they will become one, single entity and not two to oppose each other. Then you will actually know whom to listen at the precise moment, there will be clarity, no longer any confusion as to whom should you listen? You will be crystal clear about what needs to be done, you will be decisive and a quick decision maker. In any given moment, you will know what should be done, without any fears, and no tantrum child will be in denial of your desires, instead that Cool, Calm Emotional Body will add "FUEL" to the Fire.
When mental decisions have emotional intensity, they always work out, always! Because Emotional Body is 70% of you and mental body is only 30% of you.
One becomes a True seeker (30% + 70%), instead of a professional seeker (30%) when that 70% of emotional intensity is added, when one is in completion with their Inner Child.
Have a healed mind and heart! Be all in Completion with all that they are, and all that they have.
~ Adiguru Prakriti
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Thanks!