Don't do Meditation!

Yes! You read it right. Don't do Meditation.

• Because meditation cannot be done
• Because meditation is not a "doing" or "action"
• Because meditation is a non-doing or inaction
• Because by "doing" by "action" you cannot achieve "non-doing" or "inaction"
• Because meditation is a 'happening within you', it's a state of your "Being" not your "Mind"
• Because meditation means "not involving mind" or "bypassing the mind"

Until I reached the USA, the word "Meditation" meant something else for me. Until then it meant something like doing some exercises to sharpen your brain powers or neurons power of your mind. It meant "mental exercise" for me. 

Now if you just type "Define Meditation" in Google, it displays the definition as below - 

meditation

mɛdɪˈteɪʃ(ə)n/

noun

1. the action or practice of meditating.

   
   

   "a life of meditation"

   
   

   synonyms:

   contemplation, thought, thinking, musing, pondering, consideration, reflection, prayer, deliberation, study, rumination, cogitation, brooding, mulling  over, reverie, brown study, concentration, speculation; rarecerebration "cultivating the presence of God in meditation and prayer"

   • a written or spoken discourse expressing considered thoughts on a subject.

     plural noun: meditations

     
     

     "this is not a mythopoetic meditation on manhood, it's a historical study"
   • 
     

   
   

Now you can clearly read above that the definition itself says "it's an action" and you can see that all the synonyms are "action", "active verbs" that involves "mental activity". It clearly says that Meditation means "Involvement of Mind, Practice through Mind". 

Now if you search for the Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition for Mediation or Meditate, it is given as below-

1. 
   

2. Definition of meditate

   meditate; meditating

   1. intransitive verb

   2. 1:  to engage in contemplation or reflection - He meditated long and hard before announcing his decision.
   3. 2:  to engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one's breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness

   4. transitive verb

   5. 1:  to focus one's thoughts on:  reflect on or ponder over He was meditating his past achievements.
   6. 2:  to plan or project in the mind:  intend, purpose He was meditating revenge.

Again here you can clearly see that it's talking about Mind, Mental exercise, mental involvement, thought-process, focus, concentration and so on. 

So I had a perfect understanding of what it means and I had no confusion about it. But slowly after living in America, I realized that people are actually confused here. They are actually trying to achieve the state of "Dhyana" but they call it "Meditation" here and hence so much mental effort they are trying to put into it because Meditation is defined as "action involving mind". 

When Westerners were translating the Hindi & Sanskrit Spiritual Knowledge often there were no words available in the English language so whatever closest word they could find according to "their understanding" they would use that. When Dhyana was being translated there were 3 words available; Focus, Concentration & Meditation. Focus and Concentration were very limited ones, Meditation was vague and expansive word covering a lot of meaning, so they used the word meditation for Dhyana. But since they were NOT MEDITATIVE people who were translating it, they never really "attained Dhyana" so mental understanding resulted in a translation that was for the mind, and is of absolutely no use. There are many such corrupted, polluted words that lost their meaning in translation, like "contemplation", "Samadhi", Self, Selfishness, Brahm/THAT and many more words. 

SUBTLE METHODS TO ATTAIN DHYANA

Using 3rd Eye Chakra

The State of Dhyana can be attained directly.

Though one can go via the Mind (5 Senses/Manas) or Physical Body (Yoga/Yogic Tapas) route too. But that is far more time consuming and difficult, yet for some that may be the best and only option. No method is right or wrong, it depends from person to person and the level of "intensity" that one has. 

Now, How can one attain Dhyana directly? DO NOT involve your Mind at all, that means No Attention, No Focus, No Concentration on Yantra, Mantra, Japa, Chanting, Images, Colors, Light or any outside object at all. Nothing needs to be done which involves, activates your mind. Dhyana can be easily achieved without any mental activity at all, we are trying to recognize the distance from any mental activity and thoughts. That distance need not be "created" by going far away or involving in yantra, mantra, chanting and this or that. That distance ALREADY exists in you, because you are not your thoughts or emotions or mind. All you have to do is STILL yourself, so you can SEE/FEEL/PERCEIVE that distance. 

So when we use the direct methods to attain Dhyana using 3rd Eye Center the first thing to understand is that there already is a huge distance/gap/separation between you and your mind-thoughts-emotions-bundle. Dhyana means that GAP, that SILENCE, that STILLNESS within, it already exists. There is no need of any efforts to Create it. You just have to recognize it, tap into it, perceive it without using ANY of your 5 senses (Manas) because it is beyond the perception power of 5 senses. That means 5 senses should be withdrawn so they do not create a distraction. 

Sit cross-legged on the floor or asana (cotton/wool/jute/bamboo or natural organic material mat) with your back straight. Room or your place of Dhyana should be a QUIET one. Your ears should not get any input. Start Dhyana at night, when it's all dark outside and you can turn off the room lights as well so eyes will not get input either. Light up a very small candle in front of you about 3 feet away, to increase the Etheric vibration and so you can see the "tip of your nose". You shouldn't be seeing the entire room and stuff and things around clearly at all. Nothing should be touching your body. Eat food two hours before or after Dhyana, so taste buds are not so excited and stomach/digestion process is not causing distractions. Wear appropriate clothes so neither you are cold nor you should be feeling too warm. For few days just do this much, try to practice sitting with a straight back, because there is no point in going forward with a weaker foundation. If sitting cross-legged is a problem then sit on the chair but with back straight. If you do not have any prescribed medical condition which prevents you from sitting on the floor cross-legged then try, try and try until you become comfortable sitting that way. You will always see the Awakened ones sitting in Padmasana, or Siddhasana or Ardhpadmasana like poses only because there is a big reason for that, it's about creating a perfect circuit of energy in your Etheric body. Samadhi is also a posture/pose/asana of the body initially when it happens. Once Dhyana or Samadhi states becomes your Natural State of being then it won't matter how your physical body is, but then naturally you won't be able to slouch your back even if you want to, you will sit cross-legged or with one leg half folded even on the chair because in all the other ways you will feel uncomfortable. 

Once you are able to still your body and you are able to sit for at least 15 minutes in a cross-legged position without moving and you are accustomed to the dark room with only a small candle then comes the second step. 

The second step is to just throw a "glance",  very "gentle look" on the tip of your nose. Do not focus, do not concentrate, as there is no Eifel Tower or Taj Mahal there to look, there is nothing to look or to put focus or concentration on. There should not be any "effort" done at all. Just a simple, gentle glance, look on the tip of the nose that will "half close" your eyes. This is being done so neither your eyes stay open and get tons of inputs to distract you by activating your conscious mind, and nor your eyes close completely and your subconscious becomes active and you start slipping in the dream mode instead. So for Beginners eyes should not be fully open and should not be fully closed. Initially, this gentle glance/look will break every few seconds, but slowly by practicing you will be able to sit like this for 10-15 minutes. Initially, you will feel like it is creating a sort of pressure in your forehead, which is nothing to be worried about. Because yes, it is creating pressure on your 3rd Eye point and that is the reason we are doing it. Now you will realize that when you throw a gentle glance on the tip of your nose anywhere, anytime you CANNOT THINK. There will not be any thoughts at all. Once you master this glance you can do it anywhere, anytime. But never do it for more than 15-20 minutes. That's all. Slowly this "thoughtlessness" will start taking deeper and deeper roots in you. And that's what Dhyana is, a "thoughtless state". After a couple of months, you will be able to tap into this "thought-less" state without even glancing on the tip of your nose. Dhyana state can be achieved instantly with even just first try, it is something very very simple. And just in 3-4 months, it takes roots in you, this thoughtless state becomes your natural state to be, like how anxiousness or fear or stress or frustration were your natural states before. 

Once glancing the tip of your nose is learned you never need a special place, asana or other favorable surroundings, its good if you have them but if you want you can come out of those sensory limitations. Once Dhyana state can be achieved without throwing this glance on the tip of the nose, then give up that too, don't keep on doing it for more than few months at all. Keep giving up on all such things that were used to get into that Dhyana state. Buddha used to say - Once you cross the river do you keep carrying the "boat" with you? No! You leave the boat after crossing the river and do not carry it on your shoulders wherever you go. So that's the point. Do not carry the boat, the mode, the practice part, just "be that thoughtless state". Drop the boat once you have arrived on the other shore. 

Now few important things to understand here are that Dhyana is the state of "non-doing", "stillness" of "being", not the stillness of Mind. Mind CANNOT be made still at all, the mind is a mind and it's futile to fight it, you can never teach non-doing, non-thinking to the monkey mind, so why struggle on that front. You are trying to silent your mind which is against the nature of mind but why worry about mind at all, let it be there, you do whatever needs to be done and it doesn't involve mind at all. Thoughts become a problem when you want to Attain Dhyana using your Thoughts & Imagination. When your understanding of Dhyana is the definition of Meditation. That's when you struggle and make mistake. If you can keep your body still, then Dhyana happens INSTANTLY. Try right now, just throw a gentle glance on the tip of your nose. You won't be able to "think" anything, thoughts will not be there. All you need to do is make this state a little longer, deeper in you. Let it sink within you. Some people will struggle with this throwing a gentle glance on the tip of the nose because they will start focusing on it, concentrating on it, the moment it happens means the mind is on the crime scene now, stop it, break it try again. It should be a very gentle, soft, effortless look. 

So just these two steps - the First one "Preparation for Dhyana" and Second one "Be in Dhyana". Just like one Prepares themselves to be in the shower first by taking off clothes etc and then one is in the shower. That's all, it's simple, no complications. No struggle and Mind is not at all in the picture, neither Thoughts nor Emotions. Absolutely no drama at all. 

Using Prana/Pranic Energy

There is another way to attain this state of Dhyana using the 4th Chakra/Heart Chakra power. There is another simple way, through using Prana/Pranic Energy. 

Do this experiment on yourself. Think of a really fearful situation that you were in your life, anything that might have scared you very much. Think of it. Then just think how you were breathing at that time. Shallow, fast paced kind of. Now the try to breathe in the exact same way right now. Do it for 2-3 minutes and you will see that it actually created the Fear in you. Try another one, think of a time when you were sexually aroused and think how you were breathing at that time. Long rhythmic deep breaths. Try to breathe in the exact similar way right now and within few minutes you will feel sexually aroused. Try another one, think of the time when you were with your love, or with your child or anyone with whom you feel deeply in love with and think how you were breathing at that time. Try to breathe in the exact same way for few minutes and you will feel love within. So what this tells you is that Emotions can Change/Trigger a specific Breathing pattern, and Breathing pattern can Initiate/Trigger the emotion in you accordingly. Emotions or Emotional Energy are part of your Heart or Heart's Energy field. And there is no way to access Heart Chakra or Energy Field of the Heart except either through Emotions or through Breathing. Now emotions are highly unstable and keep on forcing your Breathing pattern to be arrhythmic, out of sync. The State of Dhyana is also the energetic field of the Heart/Heart Chakra. So by tapping into that energetic field, you can attain Dhyana. How?

Preparation of Dhyana - Start watching your breath, just become aware of your breath. No need to change it at all. In any given moment just watch your breath. Do not focus or concentrate on "how am I breathing?" Don't get into the analysis of your breathing pattern. Just simply, effortlessly watch your breath. Now this "watching/being aware of" is a quality in you, just like any other emotion and it exists in you. No need to mentally focus or concentrate on your Breath. No mind involvement. Just a gentle, soft watching, being aware of your Breath. 

Dhyana - Slowly from that breathing "watchfulness/awareness" will arise in you. Just like above I explained that emotion of fear can create a specific breathing pattern, and the reverse is also true, a specific breathing pattern can initiate/trigger the emotion of fear in you.  So in the same way we are at first using our natural quality of "watching/being aware" to watch our Breath, and then slowly through that "watchfulness/awareness" will arise within. The more and more we do it, the more this watchfulness/awareness within starts taking deeper roots. If you are being watchful or aware of your breath then you cannot think of anything else. Initially, this watchfulness/awareness of breath will be broken shortly after you start, but keep coming back to that again and again.  Initially, you will be able to recognize it after you are done with "being watchful or aware of your breath" or maybe an hour later. Slowly you will start noticing this watchfulness more and more. This quality of watchfulness or awareness is not connected to anything in you. It's a space, void kind of thing.This thoughtless state, this watchfulness/awareness is Dhyana. It is not about watching or being aware of something particular at all, it's just a natural quality that we all have, and it can be initiated/triggered in you through breathing. Some people may struggle with this technique when they get into an analysis of their breath or their chest going up & down or anything like that. If you see yourself doing that, stop, try again, just simply be watchful, be aware. Within few days of practice, watchfulness/awareness will arise within you. Once you start recognizing it, it will start taking deeper roots. You can do this by sitting anywhere in any pose, day or night or whenever. But it works best when you are sitting cross-legged with your back straight, or at least with your back straight. This is another powerful way to attain Dhyana. 

Other than the above there are many Pranayam techniques, Kriya Yoga techniques. 

GROSS METHODS TO ATTAIN DHYANA

Using Mind/Manas/5 Senses

Mind has 4 dimensions, aspects, functions - 

• Manas - Sensory Control 
• Aham - The "I" maker
• Buddhi - Intellect
• Chitta - Impressions, Perception storage 

Now from the above 4, Manas is a really powerful gross dimension, aspect and can be used to attain Dhyana. One can fix their glance on a Yantra and can use their Eyes or can Listen to Mantras and use their ears, or can use their Speech to Chant a Mantra and vibrate their Consciousness, or one can use Tantra to go deep down into the depths of sense of "Touch" and activate the flow of energy to reach Consciousness, Awareness. There are different methods & techniques involving senses and Manas and it depends on a person as to which sense will work for him. Many yogis used Yantra, many Chanted Mantra, many heard (Shruti) the Mantra and yet many went through the routes of Tantra. 

One can use their Chitta - Impressions storage house too, to see the stored reflections and purify Chitta and learn the life lessons and raise their vibrations, consciousness level and erase the boundaries, limitations of “I”, “Me”, “Mine”. 

Using Etheric/Energy Body

Kundalini Awakening, Kriya Yoga methods work directly on the Energy Body or Etheric layer of your body. For some people, this is the best option. 

Using Physical Body

Many people attain Dhyana through Physical Body Tapas, by doing Hatha Yoga or other types of Yogas. But for that "intention" should be to "attain dhyana" and not just well-being. This may take a longer time to manifest but all these methods work too. 



While choosing a method to attain Dhyana, if you are trying by yourself then try Subtle Methods first and then go for Gross methods. No method is right or wrong, no one method is better than any others, it all depends on YOU. By doing Martial Arts or just by sweeping floor also one can attain Dhyana. It is NEVER about the Method actually. One Single deciding factor is “INTENSITY”. How much Intense anyone is, how much is the Fire Within and if one is really Intense then ANY method will work.

Now, let's understand "why" are we trying to attain Dhyana state? Benefits of attaining it are so many and can be categorized into two major categories - 

• Physical, Mental, Emotional, Energetical Well-Being
• Moksha/Liberation

Once a person attains Dhyana state and is able to tap into that silence, that void, that watchfulness, then he/she naturally becomes peaceful. And despite leading a hectic, busy, stressful life one knows how to maintain the distance from the mind and doesn't indulge in overuse of alcohol, drugs type of stuff to numb the mind to stop the thought process. Maintaining the distance from mind results in an improvement in energy level. Once he/she becomes Calmer and Peaceful, it gets easier to deal with life and Physical Body gets less ruined, damaged and stays healthy instead. He/She is better equipped to deal with life situations by achieving emotional and mental balance. Hence Psychosomatic diseases do not happen to such a person. Once this Dhyana state takes deeper roots in anyone, then it CANNOT be LOST. You cannot unlearn it, or loose it. You may forget about it, but by similar small practice, you can again be back to it. The effect of it stays with you for a very long time, even if you don't do it. 

Now those whose interest in Dhyana is to achieve Well-Being of Body, Mind or Emotions they do not need more information than what is already provided. 

Those who are looking for Moksha/Liberation and are on their journey to find the Ultimate Truth they can take this State of Dhyana to whole another level. That's whole another dimension of understanding & living in itself. Most important thing to understand is that this will cause a major stir, overhaul in your life and everything that you have hidden inside will start coming to the surface to change the perception and once it is addressed another issue/block/unconscious pattern may come and this is going to be a heck of a roller coaster ride, but this State of Dhyana and then working on your issues by setting the correct perception will slowly "transform" you, will deplete your Karmic Account really fast and will help you achieve Moksha, will show you the Ultimate Truth, will help you Realize your True Nature. 

~ Adiguru

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Mystery of the Lotus Flower

My early childhood was spent in a house in Lalitpur, UP India, which was on the shore of a huge water pond (Talab in Hindi) called Raja Mansingh Talab, little smaller than the river, but very deep and larger than any usual pond. Many temples were situated all around the shore of it.  Many accidents & deaths used to happen in that huge talab as it was so deep and had water snakes, crocodiles and what not and on one far end, it had a huge swamp full of water weed and lots of Pink Lotus flowers. 

    Lalitpur - Religious Celebration on the temples around Raja Mansingh Talab at night

    Lalitpur - Temples around Raja Mansingh Talab

I lived in that house near temples since I was 6 years old till I was 9. The temples & talab shore were my playgrounds and some of the priests knew my father and they knew I was his daughter. Often I used to play with my younger sister & brother there in the afternoons after coming back from school and my favorite activity was to sit on the back of the Durga Temple and look at that far away swamp where there were so many Pink Lotuses. For hours I used to stare at those lotus flowers without having a sense of time or my surroundings. 

    Pink Lotus

After evening Prayers/Arti in the temples, devotees used to get some Prasad (sweets offerings) and I often went inside the temples just to see if there is a Lotus Flower as some devotee may have offered that to the Goddess/Deity and if I see one I used to ask the priest to give me that as Prasad instead of sweets or fruit, but rarely I got any. Then I used to stare at them from far for hours. Flower sellers used to sell very few lotuses that too around 4:00 AM in the morning at temples opening time. It was very difficult and dangerous to get to that swamp to get those Lotuses. When I did not get any then the only thing was to just go at the back of the Durga Temple, sit close to the edge of the Talab and watch them from far. My fascination with them kept growing and I just wanted to be as close to them as possible and wanted to have some really bad. 

When I was 9 yrs old, one afternoon I just couldn't stop myself and decided to get down in the water and go to that swamp so I can pluck some lotus flowers. I did not know swimming and had no idea how will I reach there. But I was determined, so I slowly got down into the water which was up to my chest and slowly I started walking. Every step I was scared thinking that there might be snakes and what if crocodile comes near me and what if that swamp just swallows me, or if I get stuck there and so many people die in this Talab every year. So every step I was fighting that fear within me but my eyes, my gaze was locked by those flowers and I kept walking. It was as if those lotuses were calling me. Then I arrived at that swamp and I realized that I am sure going to get stuck and will be late for back home and my mother is going to give me a real harsh punishment today. So I tried to walk faster, water depth was above my waist but the water there was muddy and dirty and water weed was entangling in my feet and twice I felt as if water snake just crossed and touched my legs. Continuously struggling to find some ground beneath my feet, I fell into that swamp and almost drowned, but then I was more worried about my parents scolding me if I went late or with dirty clothes, I hurriedly somehow stood up and again started walking. Finally, after more than an hour of walking, I reached the closest bunch of Lotus Flowers, I tried to pluck one and realized it has a very long stem and it's hard to break them. After much struggle, I managed to get 3-4 lotus flowers and I felt so happy as if I have got the whole world. I was extremely happy. After taking few breaths I realized it's getting dark and I need to get out of this swamp and talab, but the moment I turned my back and looked around I realized I couldn't see the shore, I did not know which direction to walk back and I became really worried thinking that my parents are definitely going to beat me today. So whatever came to my mind I just started walking back with flowers in my hand and after one and half hours I entered home with my face, hairs and frock all dirty, drenched in water, I even lost one of my slippers in the swamp, the moment my mom saw me she got towel and cleaned me and to my surprise did not scold me. Then I realized there was a search going on for me as it was more than 4 hours that I was missing. 

So this was the height of my mad fascination with Lotus Flowers and I did not know why there was such a strong bond and love I felt for only those flowers. No other flower I found that magical.  

Now in 2009, I moved from Iowa to Florida in the USA. It was spring time and my first day in the small town Lake Mary near Orlando. That town is full of ponds and is one of the most beautiful places to live. It was my first day in office so I was driving to my office and on the way, I saw a pond full of same Pink Lotuses. I immediately put the break in my car and stopped it in the nearby parking. It was around 8:45 AM and I thought I still have 10 minutes to reach the office, let me just go to that pond to look, after all, it's been a lifetime since I saw Pink Lotuses. I was very happy to find some in Florida and it was my first day in Florida, overall it was a very happy day for me. After parking the car, I almost ran towards the pond and watched lotuses in complete awe, stood there for a couple of minutes and then I came back to my car. When I turned on my car the time displayed was 9:25 AM, I thought what the heck, I looked at my wrist watch it displayed 9:25, I checked my phone and it was 9:25. I took a deep breath and sat there for few minutes to understand what just happened? I only stood there watching pink lotuses for a moment, a couple of minutes may be, how did 40 minutes went by and I did not realize at all. I just couldn't believe. 

I kept wondering whole day while working in the new company/office that I joined that day. In the evening when I was driving back it suddenly occurred to me that "I went into Trance and that's why I lost the sense of Time & Space" and instantly I realized that since childhood Pink Lotus flower was actually pushing me into the Transcendental State. Hence the reason I was so mad, so fascinated and so madly in love with them. 

From 2011, I was walking my spiritual journey consciously. Then in 2016 when Self Realization happened I realized I became a Lotus Flower as the Sahasrar/7th Chakra blossomed full blown as a Thousand Petal Lotus. 

Universe was sending me reminders in such a beautiful manner through pink Lotuses all along in my life. Even when I had a body like a child, Universe knew the Soul and created such a magical bond between me and the Lotuses, so I do not forget ever what did I came here for, why I had this human body and why this is my last life. The pull of this pink Lotus was the pull of Divine/SELF within me, as me, it was a calling within me all along. Real lotuses around me were just the symbols. I could have lived anywhere else, but no, Universe arranged my life around Temples only, first in Lalitpur and then in Mathura, Vrindavan where Yamuna River shore was full of pink Lotuses.

Finally, I learned and am living the Secret of the Lotus Flower. 

And just recently in May 2017,  I realized that this thousand petal Lotus Flower holds a really shiny jewel on the top middle of my forehead which keeps me showered in its light. Never before I felt the lotus flower so divine with beauty beyond words. Eyes open or close all I see is that Divine Light and that fountain of light which emerges from that Jewel. 

The search for Lotus flower ended and so did the mystery :-)

~ Adiguru

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Renunciation, Grace & Choice!

When I was around 14 yrs of age we were living in a small town Lalitpur in UP, India. My father was a doctor, ENT Surgeon in the government hospital there. In the summer time when schools were closed on May 15th, 1989 a Super fast train Karnataka Express was derailed just on the outskirts of Lalitpur. More than 9-10 coaches of the train came tumbling down from the bridge over the small river. It was a really horrible disaster and everyone in the town was going there to help and when I learned about it, I just wanted to go there to help too, but my parents understood what could be there so they strictly denied and said it's not a place for children, and went there without taking me on the first day. So second day when they were out there, I went to my convent school's Mother & Sisters/Nuns and I saw them gathering supplies for Red Cross. I told them please admit me in Red Cross right away because I also want to go there and help. Mother Jude looked at me as no other kid was there, it was summer vacation, but somehow she said OK, you can help us distribute these water bottles and they took me in the van with them.

    Image Source - Web/News

When I reached the site of the train accident, what I saw I couldn't have ever imagined in my wildest dreams. Train coaches were scattered, were upside down as if toys lying here and there, two coaches were on fire, a ton of black smoke, dead bodies, burned, with limbs, without limbs, blood, flies, crows, vultures around, people screaming, crying, people's clothes soaked in blood. Few coaches got electric current passed in them when the speeding electric train broke the connecting wires, so some bodies were electrocuted, some fell into the river and their bodies were swollen. There were dead kids, their shoes with blood, many toddlers orphaned, people couldn't find their family, most of the bodies couldn't even be recognized, identified. So many injured were crying out loud looking for their family members and finding their bodies. Police and Hospital staff set up the makeshift morgue to put all bodies that they found around and in the Train coaches and were continuously pulling out. Many suitcases with costly sarees & jewelry were lying open as the train was coming from South India, Karnataka and was full of many wealthy people, families.

It was a highly devastating sight and very painful one showcasing the Dance of Death with utmost cruelty! I was making my way by crossing over the bodies and limbs around to get to the injured and give them water to drink and see how else I could help as I learned the entire first-aid from my doctor parents.

The first day when I was there, I was very angry at God, and painful and asked the question within myself - How can God do this to these people? Does God even exist? Why people are even born if everyone has to die? Why did I born? I was questioning my very own existence. The devastation, pain, and misery around me were just too much to take in and numbed my mind, made me thoughtless.

The second day that I was there, another question was echoing very loud within me, over and over again - Why should we live, if everything has to end so abruptly, suddenly? Why do people gather so much wealth when it's of no use, they died suddenly and left all their valuables which look like garbage now? I couldn't stop thinking that many people were going for celebrations and were about to meet their families & loved ones in Delhi, many had family members waiting at home to return. But NO! No one reached where they thought or planned for, instead hundreds around me are just lying burnt or electrocuted or butchered not even to be identified by their own family members due to the horribly distorted body. I had so much pain within me seeing the FUTILITY OF LIFE. This was my INITIATION into RENUNCIATION. It seemed Death is the Only Truth that exists, all else is just useless, false. How does that matter who and what one has when Death one day will end everything so cruelly? The bare naked truth of Death, Pain, and Misery was in front of me, that too in the incomprehensible amount.

The third day I was helping everyone there with super speed, I suddenly found the energy and speed thinking that I will die too and it could be tomorrow or any moment, so I need to get everything done really fast and today. I need to help these injured but alive ones and stop thinking about all those dead ones. In my past 40 years of life, people around me always wondered and questioned me why I was so short of patience (that's how they saw it) and why things couldn't wait? And my parents were seriously annoyed for the rest of their life due to my "sense of urgency" in everything that I did or wanted to do or wanted to happen. The sense that "I am mortal" took deep roots in me and after that day, I just lived in TODAY, NOW and there was no time to ponder or hang on to the past and no time to worry too much about future, no too much thinking, just doing whatever was in front of me that day, that hour, that moment. I excelled in everything that I did in a very short amount of time, without knowing what is fueling all outcomes, what is giving me the energy to keep going. It was that realization of "being mortal". It never let me hold on to yesterday, on to the past in any way and it did not let me procrastinate or dream about some future for which I may or may not even be alive. Letting go everything of yesterday, of past became my living practice.

After 3 days I couldn't eat, sleep or even cry and had a high fever and couldn't go there anymore. My parents scolded me for going there and not listening to them and they tried hard to make me cry as they thought I went into shock. But no I wasn't in shock.

That pain was consuming me but my burning questions needed answers, my focus was on my questions. I wanted to know what is this drama that we play whole life when death will take everything away from us. Why people born? Why should I live? This life is totally meaningless and death is the ultimate truth. After few days I asked these questions to my father and he thought that train accident had a deep impact on me and he said don't think too much about it, a human body is mortal, everyone who is born will die one day but Soul lives forever. But that answer didn't satisfy me. I asked him to get me Vedas, Purans, Gita, Bible, Koran, Torah everything that he could as I wanted to know, I was restless and needed answers. He got me everything and I started reading, within 3-4 months I was done with the reading and realizing that I still couldn't find my answers.
Because those answers couldn't be grasped by the mind, by reading, such existential wisdom is meant for experiential reality. But I never stopped asking those questions until Enlightenment happened.

I lived my life in so much pain, pain that couldn't be described, couldn't be attached to anything particular.

Before this train tragedy whenever I used to go to Hospital to my father I used to see sick and poor and dead around me and always I felt as if I could mirror their pain as is in me and I felt so painful that I used to write poetry after seeing all that, poetry full of pain, stories full of pain of life. Even the tree shedding it's leaves in autumn seemed so painful to me. The cause of my pain was "separation" and it is the biggest "illusion/Maya/ignorance" that we live in and it cannot be removed until it becomes our experiential reality through Enlightenment or Self-Realization. No matter how many Guru's or Religious, Spiritual scriptures tell us that "It's All One, we are in Union always", there is no way to mentally grasp it or understand it. Our perception has to change to bring it to reality, so we can live that Union.

Now the Pain that this train accident caused was seen as a curse by so many people around me who went there to help because it made them experience such horrible things and many became fearful and paranoid and some were haunted in their dreams for more than a year. I did not become fearful, I wasn't holding onto the dead or injured, I was holding onto my questions. I did not go into any depression as pain in me was pushing me to find the answers. I became true renunciate by heart and accepted my own mortality and started living from that. So this pain that I went through for so long was a GRACE bestowed upon me to show me the "futility of living life in a mundane way, gathering so much material wealth, losing love & compassion and choosing greed, choosing fear and not love to live life, constantly keeping oneself busy with mundane and refusing to look at the big picture" and all these became the foundation for my life and spiritual journey.

Grace is not just the good results of our efforts. Grace is also our capacity, the capability to make those efforts. Grace is the ability to see the choices and make the right choice. I could have gone into fear and mental imbalance after experiencing so much pain of that train tragedy, but it did nothing like that to me, instead transformed me, gave me the tremendous amount of powerful pain and forced me to ASK the Questions and LOOK for the answers, that everyone in the human body should be asking themselves and should be finding answers for. I chose that pain and looked at it as grace and became a renunciate in just a few hours. Since then, I owned houses, cars, relationships, but nothing could ever own me at all, I could leave everything behind in a moment, I had no fear of losing anything at all including my body. Kindness and Compassion were the only conditionings that happened to my mind. I discarded all bookish knowledge, so called religious rituals and practices, and wanted to have Direct Experience of Life. Belief systems couldn't take place in me. I became fearless in everything I did, like playing, catching snakes or climbing mountains or speed driving. I was very clear about the fact that "I am going to die one day, so I will not die every day in fear at all". I chose to live fully every day before that one day/moment of death comes to me.

All this was a very powerful way of living, living from the heart fearlessly, full of love and compassion. Neither keeping past/grudges/issues in my heart instead forgiving people quickly, nor keep dreaming of some rosy future, rosy life, lofty worldly or spiritual goal. After this incident I could never see the life, the people around me in the same way and realized that I need to put myself in their shoes in order to understand them because everyone's life is full of Pain. And on the other side, that pain kept pushing me to find answers so I can not only eliminate my pain but other's pain too. Helping others became my motto, as I realized life is hard, cruel and death is the ultimate truth. I lived in the world but never belonged to it, I was in the world but was outsider there.

So grace could be bestowed upon us in so many ways, pain is grace too.

Here is the link to that train tragedy news and pictures for curious & courageous ones.

- http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/karnataka-express-derailment-shows-indian-railways-basic-infrastructure-remains-inadequate/1/323468.html

Do not click on this link if you are a chicken by heart, as it has some really disturbing pictures.

Whatever it is that life is throwing at you, you could turn it into Grace by making a Conscious choice. Grace is always there, you have to let it work. Life has many possibilities and we have to choose which possibility we want to bring to reality and that's how we create, we write our own destiny. We can choose Love over Fear. We can choose Pain over mundane temporary pleasures of life. We could choose freedom over temporarily comforting beliefs systems of our society. We could choose the strength of our heart over living in fears. We could choose strong will power to survive anything in life over depression and mental imbalance.

It's our choice!

When we choose Fear, the bad astrological predictions, bad possibilities become our living reality. I could have chosen fear instead of pain as I was just a child/teen and could have lived with depression for many years to come. I could have chosen that horrible scene to dream horrible dreams. I could have let that train tragedy destroy me in so many ways. There were so many possibilities. But I consciously chose pain, pain as a Grace. I accepted that Pain and accepted that it is meant for something else which I do not understand now and I was OK with being miserable within, instead of surrendering to Fear. I refused to accept fear! And that choice changed the whole outcome as I am living here today in front of you as a WHOLE BEING. Not broken, not emotionally or mentally fractured, not fearful, doing everything with love and compassion, helping others without any expectations. Then will you say I made the wrong choice? Because I lived for 25 years in indescribable Pain until my Enlightenment. Just imagine how me choosing fear at that time would have turned out? Who or what it would have made me? What it would have done to me? Possibilities were so many, right? But we all have a choice ALWAYS. Any situation, event, person, circumstance in life always shows us so many possibilities and gives us many choices. It's up to us what we choose.

When one loves oneself, he/she will accept Pain rather than being fearful. Love over fear is a choice. And it's not necessary that choosing Love is going to be very comfortable, soothing for you. Love and Fear are the two sides of one coin. Self-Love is not about rejecting pain and always looking for comforts, easiness, peace. Self Love is the love for and love of your own Soul/Atma and could bring tremendous amount of unexplainable pain, could stir one's life very deeply. That pain could help one evolve, fear only makes devolution happen, it's a waste of time and life-energy. Choosing a difficult path than surrendering to fear is what makes us evolve and be wholesome some day. Letting fear consume you is easy, gathering your will-power and choosing pain, Self-love is difficult. But you can see how it can transform one for good forever. And this is not a one-time choice, we make that choice every day, it's a fight every day.

Just see what choices are you making in life and what your past choices have done to you. How many times you gave into your Fear? How many of your life choices were made out of fear? How many decisions you took to stay in your fear? And see what all it has gotten you into. Do you have PEACE in your heart when you sleep at night? Do you have really truthful, sparkling, smiling eyes? Are you joyful within? Do some retrospection and make the necessary changes. Living unhappy and dying unhappy isn't a good thing.

~ Adiguru

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Love vs Awareness/Pure Consciousness - Highest Degree of Polarity

We often talk about different polarities that exist in the world, in the Universe. Like Masculine & Feminine, Dark and Light, Pain and Pleasure, Low and High etc. But do you know what is the highest degree of polarity? 

It's Love (as in emotional love) Vs Awareness (As in Pure Consciousness).

Love vs Awareness is the highest degree of polarity that exists. They are exact opposites. Love needs something outside of you and Awareness is the absence of that outside object. Love is outgoing energy, Awareness is simply inward. Love needs two, Awareness stands Alone. Love is a relationship, Awareness is the absence of all relationships. Love means Happening, Becoming, while Awareness means simply Being. 

Now the most paradoxical thing is that without going towards Love one cannot return towards Awareness. You have to be deep, madly in love with the other person. Love demands possession, however subtle it may be. But the other cannot be possessed. So by loving one learns to dissolve the tendencies to possess one way or the other, frustration goes all-time high, one disappointment after the other have to be faced. Slowly this teaches you "freedom" as you have to "let go" every day one thing or the other, all desires have to fly out of the window as they are not being met and will not be realized. The more you free your beloved, the more freedom you yourself experience. One boundary after the other has to be broken. Love starts burning you with its high intensity. The face of the lover starts reflecting you. If they are happy, you feel happy, if they are sad you feel doomed if they cry your world comes to an end and seeing them smile time stops for you, your heart skips a beat every time your eyes meet your beloved. It's like looking at the reflection of the moon in a lake and trying to catch it, immersing into the river fully, digging into the bottom of the river only to find that moon is not there. Reflection of the Moon is not the real moon. Love is that Lake, it's simply reflecting the Moon. Lover becomes the medium of that reflection. Love forces you to die every day in bits and pieces, lose your ego, your mind, yourself bit by bit until NO MORE of YOU is left. 

After such a terrific journey of Love one realizes that Moon is not in the lake and looks UP! There! Up there he/she sees the moon in the sky, the real one. So all the disappointments, discontentment that happens in love OPENS up the door to the Awareness. And then one dies fully. One arrives home!

Those who have NOT loved anyone deeply, madly have not even found the reflection of the Moon, forget about finding the Real Moon. Those who have not loved have not known what Devotion is. Devotion is the highest state of love, it is that unconditional surrender where one accepts to keep dying in bits and pieces until one is no more. So Love is necessary to attain perfect Awareness, perfect Stillness. It hurts, it's painful, but then what is the use of this life and body if it has to be saved, caged from the pains of Love, from the hurts of life. 

Most people love the other just little bit, very safely, so as to not lose themselves fully. Such people do not put everything on the stake to lose. Those who are scared to love and are saving themselves from the pain and hurt will not find Divine. They do not want to let their ego, their mind die and till the time ego/mind are alive there is no place for Divine. Then the death of body will impact them real bad and they will be fearful of it. If the death of ego/mind happens before the death of body then one becomes immortal, realizes the true nature of Soul, embodies Divine/Pure Consciousness/Christ Consciousness and we call them Enlightened/Self-Realized. 

Fortunate are those who have someone to die for, someone who cannot be possessed, someone who they can never get, someone through whom their Love will reach the state of Devotion, someone to learn the last lesson of life. These are the one's sitting with their one foot in Divine Door and are on the path of Bhakti Yog (Devotional Union). Unfortunately, in most of such fortunate people the fire of love within dies before it can be converted to Devotion. So there may be Millions in Love but not everyone will know devotion. Not everyone has the courage to put everything at stake, not everyone is willing to Do or Die, Truth or Dare, play in black & white, many will compromise with the hundred shades of gray in between. Some of such Lovers will agree to play the game of building a boundary through marriage, rules of society. Once possessed Love dies, slowly after few years again the same loneliness fills the heart. Only one in a Million gets a love that cannot be possessed, the fire of which never goes down, time cannot defy the intensity and there is no such thing as compromise or boundary or rules of society. Hence only one in a Million is Enlightened.

So Love vs Awareness is the highest degree of polarity but one has to go through the fires of one to attain another. It's the same with Dark and Light too. One has to see the extreme of Darkness and burn in it in order to be Light. It is the same with every polarity. One never moves from one extreme to the other, instead one has to MERGE both! Love means possession and Awareness mean freedom, that's from where all the other polarities are born. 

This is the reason Love is regarded as the highest of emotions, highest frequency, the highest vibration that can cross all dimensions in this Universe BECAUSE it's in POLARITY WITH AWARENESS. It's the DOOR to DIVINE. 

Not a very pleasant one though, but he who has not walked through the hell will never reach the heaven either. One has to die (death of ego/mind/Jeeva) in order to be reborn, resurrected.  

~ Adiguru

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Oh c'mon I have changed! Really, Seriously?

When you are walking Spiritual Path consciously it is very important that you understand the difference between "Change" and "Transformation" and focus on Transformation and not change.

The word "change" itself means it can change, can change back, it's a continuous process, it is a movement which is mostly due to changed circumstances, events in life. If you have someone around you who expects you to behave in a certain way you will change yourself accordingly when you are around that person. Suppose you are a compulsive talker and a person whom you like is a quiet one, then around him/her you will change yourself to stay quiet, but the moment you are away from him/her you will be back as a chatterbox. If a person around you is Spiritual and doesn't involve himself/herself much in the useless mundane then just to stick around with them you will listen to their Spiritual talks and will ask questions accordingly, but the moment you are away from that person you will be back to your mundane and useless world as you belong there and that's who you truly are. If you are with a Truthful person, you will try to be truthful, but the moment you are with others you are back to your throne of lies. In a nutshell, you become like Chameleon, who will change color according to the circumstances and will adjust for the time-being but very soon will be back to the Original.

When this Original goes through an "irreversible, radical change" then it is called as Transformation. Transformation is not continuous, it is not a process, it happens once for a kind/type and it's done. It's like how a Larvae becomes a Butterfly and once it becomes a butterfly there is no going back, it cannot become Larvae again. It cannot go back to the cocoon and be pupa again. Transformation is not a process, it doesn't take long, it can happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye.

Change is an activity by your Mind, while Transformation happens through increased Awareness, it's a permanent change in Consciousness. Change is like modifying the architecture of a building, but Transformation means changing the building blocks itself. The mind is unstable, the mind is clever, and mind keeps on moving like a pendulum and will cause misery. By changing yourself you will not find Peace within, because the moment you change you are under a lot of pressure to not change back to your old ways, to your so called adopted originality. When you are Transformed you are at Peace because the change was not circumstantial, it wasn't forced from outside, it is permanent and there is no one inside you to fight against its stability. I have heard many saying that - I changed so much due to life, due to circumstances, for him or for her, but still there is no Peace, no comfort within. Yes! true! how can there be? Because you are changing yourself and not transforming yourself. You are changing yourself according to society, according to your friends, family, relatives, loved ones.

When external circumstances are "causing" the change then the moment those external circumstances changes to something else you will change again, so there is no permanence at all, no peace in your heart.

A lot of you come to me claiming that you have changed, yes I agree you have changed your way of life because you found new concepts of living, you found something that excites you more now, you found something which seems more important, meaningful, purposeful to you now. But within yourself, there is a constant struggle to not go back to your old ways and you want to make those external circumstances permanent, which is not going to happen in this ever-changing world. So you are continuously at war with yourself, your inside plane is a battlefield and fight is always on. Therefore despite changing yourself, you are not at peace.

And when you are so busy changing yourself, you are also busy either expecting or really trying to change others around you. It becomes a hyper-reactionary world, causes more misery, more suffering. Next time you try to be chameleon see if it is truly, deeply making you happy? Learn to notice and see the futility of your chameleon efforts.

So then, how should one go through Transformation? How to make it happen?

First and the foremost thing is to acknowledge and accept the way mind tries to be clever and forces you into the change according to the circumstances. Witness it, accept it and let it go. Stop being a chameleon!

Second and the last step is to increase your Awareness, by changing the quality, level of your Consciousness which cannot be achieved without achieving the Meditative State. Hence there is so much focus on breathing practices (Pranayama), Yoga, just to cultivate the Meditativeness in you. You cannot be meditative just by sitting and closing your eyes and focusing on Mantra or Yantra or music or something else. Most people need some Pranayama for few months or years before they can actually begin to truly be in the meditative state. So start somewhere from some practice and see where it leads you. Not everyone has to go through every step in the same sequence, it's a very personal and unique journey and steps given to you by your Guru/Guide are just for you, don't go on re-prescribing them to others around you.

~ Adiguru

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Quality of Pure Consciousness: Awareness

One quality of Pure Consciousness is Awareness. And every moment (or whatever smallest moment of time one can refer to) it is Aware of what needs to be done perfectly, but the next moment doesn't have the awareness, memory, record of the very previous moment. This is totally opposite of how mind executes life. Mind executes life from the memory of previous moments only, Mind cannot function without the storehouse of memory/experiences. There is no PRESENT moment for Mind at all, it's a UN-ACHIEVABLE STATE for the mind. Only Awareness have access to PRESENT moment because Present Moment Doesn't exist in the Time Dimension, it's beyond time and space. Time is always fleeting, every nanosecond is fleeting, and Mind keeps track of all that went by, passed, over. That is how the mind works. But in order for life to function, one needs only Awareness, which keeps one rooted in NOW, rooted in Present Moment, which is a STILL STATE, NO MOVEMENT of time, No Fleeting moments at all. The State of NOW, which is a state maintained by Awareness and Not by the mind. What is meant by Living in Now? The mind needs to dissolve, merge, in order to experience Now, in order to let Awareness take control. And it's not that people do not experience this state when Awareness takes the control of life and Mind is dissolved, or immersed and loses its existence, many experiences this state often, intense love, intense sexual orgasm is one such state. But yea all those are momentary and one looses them before one could understand anything about it. On the other hand, if the absorption of mind, happens as a result of intense meditation, or due to any of the Chaitanya Samadhi, then it's prolonged experience. Since my Enlightenment, a countless number of times, I have stayed absorbed in Absolute Consciousness (Nirgun Brahm) or Nirvikalpa Samadhi, and I have got accustomed to living life simply through AWARENESS. The Longest one was right after Enlightenment for 72-75 days and then NOW only NOW is there for me, nothing else. What do I lose by living with Awareness and not the Mind? Memories! It's not that I have forgotten everything about my life, my choices, my habits, and about my past, but No New Memories are being created because life is being lived in EVERY MOMENT. When I live in every moment, what is the need to record them, recall later and enjoy or sulk over them later? Express accordingly and Live in that very moment itself, and be done. Awareness is the Quality, Tangible Manifestation of Pure Consciousness. Sometimes I like to call it "Personal Consciousness" as it is operating my life, my body.

Nirvikalpa State is a highly AWARE state, means Awareness of everything around me is there, while I am in this state, I face questions like, how come you not know that you ate breakfast today or what did you eat for breakfast today? Because Awareness means living beyond time, living in NOW/PRESENT. When I had breakfast I was 100% aware of it, and later information, experience about it is not needed, Mind is not there, so no impression was made. When you are asking me about breakfast which I had 6 hours ago, that is PAST and Awareness can only have access to Present. But still if TIME needs to be looked at, means if Time/Past/Future needs to be accessed for a Real Purpose, Awareness can easily do that, it may take few minutes to tune into the Time Channel. Awareness can get you answers about your past life, which was hundreds of years ago if it is genuinely needed, but you are only asking me something really silly like what did I eat for lunch? Mundane need not to be confused with Eternity like Life. Awareness is not meant the for mundane. Will you use Jet Plane to go to the office or you will go by car? This gives people a wrong notion that when one is in Samadhi or Absolute Consciousness State, they become forgetful. No, they do not, only to the mind it appears that way. And that too it happens when there is a SHIFT.

While I am in this Absolute Consciousness (or while it "IS"), I cannot describe the World, the Creation, neither can I describe my own body symptoms, or the Absolute itself. But yet there is Awareness, an all encompassing which is the seen, sight and the seer and I cannot call it "me/he/she/God/Divine" anything, something that operates body and life with Divine Love!

By the Love of Divine, I am here. 
For the Love of Divine, I am here.

~ Adiguru

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99,000 Sheep

There is a saying back home that "there are 99,000 Sheep while there are 5 Lions in a Jungle". Now as we all know Sheep lives in herds, large groups, have similar ideas and concepts of life and most importantly they all follow one another. Contrary to this Lions usually roams around alone, have very different ideas and concepts of life and they are independent beings for most of their lives. Lion's can't be domesticated and Sheep will never be called "WILD".

Is it Sheep's fault that she is born as a sheep or is it Lion's fault that it is born as a Lion? No! Being born the way they are now is nobody's fault. Sheep are born with FEAR as the Core of their Being, while Lion's are born with COURAGE as the Core of their Being.

Sheep builds a safety net around her life because the core of her being is Fear. They follow whatever principles or rules of life were given to them by the elders, they are super afraid to venture out alone and find out the TRUTH by themselves. Their idea of family or in other words security comes when the number of family members is at least 4, 6 or more, they never understand that 2 could be a family too. When entire jungle has only 5 or so Lions then 2 is a perfect family. Sheep have their own concept of happiness, unhappiness which is mostly derived by the hypocritical way of living or what they have been told by the society, elders or whomsoever and they rant a lot if they see anyone around not complying with their principles, concepts of life that they built out of their physical, emotional, mental insecurity. Sheep lives a mentally and emotionally boxed life, they maintain hard boundaries if not truly then at least to show their herd and society that they live in. They lack the courage to break any boundary of society, herd and their world. For Sheep there is NO TRUTH beyond what they have been told. There is NO Question of trying to find any Truth, just stick to the pre-designed life and go by the rules of society, elders, parents and the herd.

Hence they never find the Truth/Brahm/Self/That and end up living a fearful life.

Quite the opposite is Lion who's life revolves around Courage. Lion ventures out alone to unknown lands and is not afraid to find out what is there and face the Truth by himself. Lion's life is "free" of all concepts, notions, and principles of life, he builds them as he goes. Lion's do not follow one another and mostly have their territory marked by choice with strength. Lion's idea of happiness and unhappiness and family is not built up of what they were told by elders or any tom, dick and harry. By living the life they find out the meaning of life. Lion doesn't live a boxed life, his spirit soars high and he does roars high.

Now again, it's nobody's fault that a Sheep is sheep and lives out of Fear, and Lion is the emblem of Courage and Strength. They both are born differently, they both are poles apart in their life.

The problem comes when Sheep starts convincing and imposing their concepts, principles of life on Lion. Lion never goes around and imposes his principles of Courage on Sheep, because Lions can smell a Sheep. Due to fluffy ears and narrowly focused vision, it becomes hard for Sheep at times to spot a Lion. Sheep rants a lot you can hear them for hours going "Beh-Beh" non-stop, while you may have never heard a Lion roaring continuously even 5 times in an hour. Kids spend hours in zoo standing in front of a Lion to hear one roar of Courage.

The question here is are you a Sheep or are you a Lion? The answer to this will tell where you will end up with your Spiritual Path. How far will you ever go on your Spiritual Journey? If you are a Sheep forget about even starting the REAL Spiritual Journey, you will NEVER even find the door, or you may end up standing in front of the door, but will never find the courage to go in. And it's not even about Spiritual Journey, as a Sheep you will end up living a "suffocating, hypocritical" life based on your false assumptions and principles. If you are fine by this, go on, keep on living that way, nobody is stopping you. Lions do not need an army of Sheep, only Sheep want Lion to be on their side. Lion can understand Sheep's fear, but Sheep has no way to know Lion's Courage and Strength.

The day you are not fine by yourself living like that and you display fearlessness in life, Courage and Strength inside your heart, I will give you Shaktipath, I will take you with me on the path of Liberation/Moksha, the path to Realize Brahm!

Until then just live your life and do not preach any Lion!

~ Adiguru

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Love from Beyond

Till the time we have human life and a human body, it will be about Relationship and Love. Here I am not talking about the emotional love that we know and I am not talking about the relationship from the social standpoint.

I am talking about Love from Beyond, Universal Love and Relationship that is Multi-Dimensional. When one is Enlightened or Self-Realized there is no capacity left to love anyone just emotionally or even unconditionally because "condition" to be "unconditional" will still be there, hence it makes no sense. We cannot play with words forever and fool ourselves.

Universal love is beyond the body, mind, emotions and beyond Soul.

    Source: The Web

Universal love starts happening at the level of Cosmos itself, there is nothing personal about it. It first draws your attention towards yourself and pushes you to become "whole", be the Universe yourself and realize your own true nature as a liberated, immortal being. Once that is achieved and you embody your divinity then it starts pulling you in its direction straight away to have the heart-on collision, yes not head-on, remember head was exchanged for divinity through Self-Realization process. The energy starts changing around you and since you are already in the state of Love-Bliss most of the time it is easy to notice, you can't miss it.

Universal Love accentuates energy on you and slowly you start accepting the possibility of a Multi-Dimensional relationship which earlier in life might have seemed like a fairy tale. Dance of energy around goes on for some time until you say "yes I am ready". Still, you don't know ready for what and ready for whom, but that's how life unfolds and you trust that divine unfolding process. Saying "yes I am ready" is the phase one of this Universal Love. The changes of energy are very tangible and suddenly your etheric body starts mingling with that Universal Love energy, without any focal point as another human, though yet.

Below is how it actually feels like emanating from the Heart Center.

    Source: The Web

Slowly you start adjusting to this energy emanating from you and being around you most of the time. It is overwhelming and could be physically tiring after a couple of days. You start living, breathing, walking into this Etheric field. It's too much to contain and it ends up spilling all around and you become the compassionate being. You start sharing that love with others. This is phase two for Universal Love energy that you are pushed towards.

Now gradually this etheric field starts changing its polarity. If you are male this energy feels like feminine and if you are female then this energy starts taking masculine polarity. This change is so subtle that you can't identify it so clearly, because once you are Enlightened or Self-Realized you lose your own gender/polarity too from your mind, being-ness has no gender, hence recognizing another doesn't come that easy. It still is a Dance of Universal love in your Etheric field and there is nothing personal about it. Day by day you learn to live with this and you kind of stay lost in it, it feels like a fragrance that is all around you, within and without, as such Enlightened and/or Self-Realized ones do not know what is within and what is without, it's all an Ocean of Infinity.

After few months from the Etheric body, energy starts getting all the way down to your other layers of the body and it starts getting little personal. You may start seeing the Visions of a man or woman, you may start feeling as if you are in an eternal embrace with them, and you may start living with them in your Multi-Dimensional form. Upon seeing and hearing through visions, you may skip a heart beat or may be stunned for few days or may end up smiling. Slowly it becomes a bond unknown, love unknown, relationship unknown. Unknown only in the worldly sense, it's very much known to you, to the core of your heart, to the core of your etheric body, to the core of your whole being, how to call it unknown anymore, it becomes more Real and Known to you than any real human being in flesh and bones around you. It becomes Reality at another dimension, yes it is the play/leela of Consciousness, but heck even the physical body, all layers of the body and even energy are that too. When anyways Leela is being played, let it be played in the best interest of the Universe. So no need to doubt it or confuse it with your Self-Realization and no need to create a boundary for you. Many Self-Realized ones were Kings, Queens and Lovers afterward. Consciousness chooses each one of us to play accordingly just like different sounds comes out of different musical instruments, though sound/naad is one and is OM and only Silence is being played in different gaps in the form of music.

                                Source: The Web

Remember you became Androgynous, Ardhnarishwara yourself through Self-Realization process, but if needed for fulfilling the divine will you can manifest the half opposite polar embodiment in the real life to stand by your side, to be with you and you both can change the world and serve the divinity together. Shakti can choose to manifest Shiva externally and Shiva can externalize his Shakti in real human feminine form. When two such whole beings are trying to do this, it is bound to come out as a reality on the relative plane with roots in Ultimate Truth.

Alternatively, you may choose to just live your Ardhanarishwara state as the way I have described it is how the embodiment of masculine and feminine polarities or Balance of both worlds feels like. Eternal Love and Romance goes on within you in Ardhanarishwara state, every bit of life around feels romantic, each expression of Consciousness feels utterly romantic. Divine glow of yours and charisma keeps everyone around you enchanted and be pulled like honey bees on flowers.

If Mother Consciousness is choosing you to manifest Universal Love in the human form, accept it as Divine Will, do not doubt it, question it and a real tangible person will be with you after enough vibrations have been synchronized for manifestation.

~ Adiguru

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Universe is within you - Jagadhatri - Cosmic Mother

During my Self Realization days, when I as Pure Consciousness was in forever expansion, critical dispersion and I was going through the fear and pain of death, one day a strange thing happened. I was fearful, or you can say that last remaining I-Thought was fearful of losing itself, it's separate identity and I was sinking slowly in some very deep unknown beyond my mind's comprehension. I truly wanted someone to assure me that I am really not dying, while on the other side I really wanted to lose that battle and die for good, without knowing what may or may not happen as a result of this process, without being concerned whether I will be able to retain body consciousness or not afterwards. I was frantically looking for a sign or Guru or someone to tell me that "it's OK, it will be OK". Energy changes were torturous enough and my head felt like it will crack open.

In the midst of all this I sat quietly as if to meditate, and slowly saw myself expanding and becoming huge like entire Cosmos, and this expansion itself might have taken more than 30 minutes, as it seems like in total I was lost for more than an hour. Then I saw and felt all the planets rotating, revolving in me, around me, all mountains in myself, all rivers flowing within me, people, trees all around me, either I became the Entire Universe or we can say entire Universe was within me. I stopped breathing completely and lost all sense of "me as a separate entity". After an hour when I regained my senses, there was a very strong knowing that if I am the entire Universe then where can I go, what else can I be, what else can I not be? When did I not exist, where will I not exist? I am not leaving, I am not dying, not going anywhere because I do not exist anymore as I, I am the WHOLE, truly the Entire Cosmos I am, I never came into being as a separate entity and hence there is no question of death or departing of Soul to some other place.

This wasn't just a vision, this was the perception through my whole being. Afterwards, this new perception kept me going and I lost all resistance to my own death, death of last remaining I-Thought/Soul/Consciousness. This is what gave me so much inner strength that there was nothing else to question, neither the process, nor the energy, neither death nor birth. Fear and pains due to energy changes were still there, but deep within I was "with the" Self-Realization process. This perception of Universe within me was a major game changer for my spiritual journey.

Months after Self Realization it occurred to me that there is Goddess named Bhuvaneshwari, also called as Cosmic Mother, or Mother of Universe, or Jagadhatri who holds the Universe within. Did I see her, became her, who is there now to tell me that, but one thing is sure, Comic Mother helps us in the last lap of our journey to reveal us our own true nature, true form and that's how we finally lose all forms and sounds. Goddess Bhuvaneshwari when doesn't want us to see the truth we see her shadow side called "Maya/Ignorance/Illusion". With the blessings of this Shakti/Power the veil of Maya is broken and beings realize their true liberated immortal nature.

~ Adiguru

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